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Home > Culture and Society

The TFT Guide To... Tougher anti-terror measures

This week it was revealed that the government is planning to introduce tighter laws on terrorism, including an offence of 'acts preparatory to terrorism', along with greater powers to detain suspects. So what will our latest clampdown involve?

6 August 2004

1) New offence of 'thinking about becoming a terrorist' to be introduced. Questions are raised about how well this strategy has been thought through when the Home Office issues police with magnifying glasses to look down suspects' ears and into their brains.

2) People congregating in groups of more than one to be arrested. Star Trek fans enjoy sense of bitter satisfaction as everyone else finds out what it's like to have their social life.

3) New 'ultra-rapid response' team headed by Jack Bauer created to neutralise terror threat in 24 hours via an utterly confusing chain of events.

4) Government to prevent massive car bomb going off in central London by issuing a leaflet encouraging people to buy tins of Oxtail soup.

5) In the future, the police will launch large-scale raids on the smallest bit of evidence to convince the public that the terror threat is real and being addressed. (CORRECTION: This policy already in place.)



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