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Home > Culture and Society

The TFT Guide to community support officers

This week the Government's plans to bolster the number of police with 'community support officers' came in for criticism. Critics suggested that CSOs might be a bit crap, because they won't be allowed to use handcuffs or detain anyone for more than 30 minutes. Which made us wonder what the future of policing is going to be like with more CSOs...

15 May 2005

1) Further questions about whether CSOs' powers are raised when it is revealed CSOs WON'T be allowed to arrest criminals, but WILL be allowed to 'tut' loudly and roll their eyes.


2) The makers of the Sweeney produce a new show: 'Regan and Carter: Community Squad'. In the first thrilling episode Jack Regan uses his immortal catchphrase: 'Could you please stop talking, if that's OK with you?' and Carter chases escaping criminals in a Ford Escort - while sticking rigidly to the 20mph
speed limit.


3) Government reviews CSO powers after officers capture an Al Quaeda cell, but have to let them go 29 minutes later.


4) CSOs adopt new interrogation technique: Nice Cop and Even Nicer Cop.


5) Tragedy ensues when newly-formed CSO Firearms Squad take on gang of armed robbers with ping pong ball guns.



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