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Home > Culture and Society

WAWIBF... Damien Cooper

9 June 2006

On Wednesday of this week, as on any other day of any other week, a large number of babies were pushed bawling into this wonderful shit-filled world of ours, without so much as a by your leave. Let alone an agent. Naturally, a large number of these babies were born around six o'clock, some of them - wait for it - at six minutes past six. Ordinarily, no one would give a tuppenny shag for these details, but this Wednesday also happened to be the sixth of June, 2006. Which can only mean one thing: Satan's PR company have been in full swing again. You'd think the fact that 'The Omen' was released on Wednesday, as opposed to today, as is traditional, would be PR coup enough. But no. Fox wanted more. And so certain newspapers - certain, we needlessly add, Murdoch newspapers - decided to dig it up.

Enter The Sun's stomach-rending coverage of Suzanne and Michael Cooper's new baby, little Damien. Coincidentally, 'horror classic "The Omen" is [Suzanne's] favourite film'. Fancy that. What The Sun failed to report is the much more entertaining story that a fucked-up print of the film has been circulated across America. In this version the skills of the most punchable child actor this side of Trenton Knight in 'The Skateboard Kid II' are somewhat upstaged by the almost constant presence of an out-of-control boom mic, bobbing about all over the shop and nestling between actors' faces on close-up. According to 'cheeruplittlegoth' on the IMDb talk boards however, 'the boom mic made the film... turned a plot hole-infested boring remake with hammish acting into something that was OK to laugh at.'

But it's not OK really. It's terrifying. Rupert Murdoch is not a myth that men with an ulterior motive created to get their way. He's real. He's out there. And he makes Damien Thorn look like Pam Ayres.

Comment on this article: letters@thefridaything.co.uk

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