there at once and praise Bob. But be careful. It could cost you your children... "> WAWIBF... Rachel Bevilacqua
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Home > Culture and Society

WAWIBF... Rachel Bevilacqua

7 July 2006

'Pity the poor human Earth Pink who comes looking for a SIMPLE, SHORT EXPLANATION of The Church of the SubGenius, one that he or she can UNDERSTAND QUICKLY. If the Church could provide THAT, it would be bigger than Islam or Christianity by now -- and probably much, much worse. True SubGenius, however, understands EVERYTHING, INSTANTLY upon exposure to the Word or even just the Face of Dobbs.'

If this is your first exposure to the Church of the SubGenius, then where the hell have you been? Get yourself over there at once and praise Bob. But be careful. It could cost you your children.

Rachel Bevilacqua recently had her young son taken away from her and placed in the custody of her ex-boyfriend, after the latter had cited her arguments with her husband and her participation in SubGenius gatherings as evidence of her unfitness to motherhood. There are many SubGenius gatherings, or Devivals, throughout the year, but the most important, X-Day, occurs in July. This is when the faithful get together and await the Sex Goddesses who will load them onto their spaceships and save them from certain death at the hands of invading alien armies. Only, for a number of extremely amusing reasons, it hasn't happened yet. Still, each year the faithful gather for this great festival of the weird, where amongst other things, religious icons are debased and giant squid are draped across women's bare breasts.

Oh, yes.

So, in a way, Pinks being the humourless fear-porters they are and Slack being the increasingly rare commodity it is, it's hardly surprising that in February of this year, one Judge Punch ordered that Rachel have absolutely no further contact with her son, not even in writing, as he felt that her involvement in previous X-Day antics was evidence of 'severe mental illness'. Naturally, Rachel is fighting this judgement, and the good news is that this week she gave evidence to a new judge, one Judge Adams, who - Praise Bob! - actually appears to have a sense of humour. So there is hope. The case is set to continue on July 20th.

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