- About TFT
Friday Thing Archive
- Politics
- Media
- Culture and Society
- War On Terror
- People
- Places
- World
- Popped Clogs
- Music
- Books
- Film
- Etc
Help And Info
- Contact Details
- Advertising
- Jobs
- Privacy Policy
- XML Feed

Home > Media

Skin Deep

25 November 2005

This week a deeply unscientific poll identified the females of Powys and Slough as the ugliest and prettiest in the UK, respectively. The data from which these tabloid facts were spun came from a new 'dating and networking' site dedicated to beautiful people. BeautifulPeople.net describes itself as 'an elite online members' club, which introduces beautiful people to truly beautiful people. It is a meeting place which is reserved for people, who because of their attractive appearance and personal qualities, stand out from the majority.' Apparently
SuperficialSmugCunt.net was already taken.

Or is merely plain-faced jealousy that makes us react in such a way? And is it that same plain-faced jealousy that has us trawling the profiles of these self-proclaimed lovelies and hoping that they're all as thick and charmless as a bagful of Britneys? Sadly, on the whole, they seem to be no more or less interesting or intelligent than their less attractive counterparts on any other dating site. Although the woman who wrote: 'I am un exotic person who doesn't like to go back from nothing' and the man who wrote: 'i'm hot and godeness like girls blonde, brunete and black i'm single want to travel with some girl' should most probably be kept apart.

Maybe on the other hand, what leaves such a bitter taste in the mouth is the fact that really, it's a form of prejudice. Worse still, it's a form of prejudice that actually affects most of us, if we're ordinary modest people with ordinary self-image issues and big ugly faces. Would it make any difference if the site were entitled Beautiful White People? Probably most of the people on there would feel a lot less comfortable - particularly the blacks - but ultimately, there is no law against personal preference. Race-specific dating already exists, as does faith-specific, size-specific and even height-specific dating, so it would seem ludicrous to dismiss BeautifulPeople.net just for discriminating against something as commonly desired as good looks.

But ultimately, it's probably got more to do with the fact that beautiful people who know they're beautiful and furthermore aren't ashamed of letting you know that they know they're beautiful, really just make everybody sick. Their lack of modesty is repugnant. Especially if you want to fuck them and they won't let you. The same goes for intelligence however. Just as anyone who's very intelligent is really duty-bound to look away embarrassedly and say 'oh hush' when their intelligence is pointed out, so beautiful people - if they're not to be resented - must have some sense of humility about them.

So, bollocks to them. Beautiful bastards. They should all go off to a paradise island together and get down to the crucially important business of physically adoring each other. Just so long as the rest of us can watch.

Comment on this article: letters@thefridaything.co.uk

Subscribe to The Friday Thing for free

Bad words ahead The Friday Thing is a weekly email comment sheet. Casting a cynical eye over the week's events, it is rarely fair and never balanced.

A selection of articles from each week's issue appear online, but to enjoy the full Thing, delivered by email every Friday - as well as access to almost five years of back issues - you'll need to subscribe. It's absolutely free.

"Razor-sharp comment and gossip." - The Sunday Times

"Hilariously cynical..To describe it as 'irreverent' is to do the newsletter an injustice." - The Observer

"Sharp, intelligent, opinionated, uncompromising and very, very funny. Just like 'Private Eye' used to be." - Alec McKelland

"Wicked" - Channel 4

"Ace" - Time Out

"'We rise once again in advocacy of The Friday Thing. We realize that some of you may be unwilling to spend [your money] on plain-text comment, but you're only depriving yourself." - The Minor Fall, The Major Lift

"Subscribing to this at the beginning of the year was undoubtedly one of the better decisions I've made. Superlative, and utterly marvellous. I look forward to Fridays now, because I can't wait for the next issue. Fucking fucking brilliant." - Meish.org

"Featuring writers from The Observer, Smack The Pony and The 11 O'Clock Show... will continue to attract new subscribers sight unseen" - NeedToKnow

"The Friday Thing is so good it's stopping me from doing a bunk of a Friday afternoon." - Annie Blinkhorn (The Erotic Review)

"So now" - The Evening Standard

"Damn it, you rule. May you never, ever back down." - Paul Mayze

"Ace" - PopJustice

"Snarky" - Online Journalism Review

"Can you please stop making me laugh out loud... I'm supposed to be working, you know!" - Tamsin Tyrwhitt

"Your coverage of stuff as it spills is right on the money." - Mike Woods

"Popbitch with A-Levels." - Tim Footman

"In an inbox full of trite work-related nonsense, TFT shines from under its subject heading like the sun out of Angus Deayton's arse." - Nikki Hunt

"A first rate email. It's become an integral part of my week, and my life would be empty and meaningless without it (well, *more* empty and meaningless anyway)." - Mark Pugh

"Genius, absolute bit of class. And you can quote me on that." - Lee Neville

"If you're hipper than hell, this is what you read." - MarketingSherpa

"The most entertaining email I've had all week. Great tone." - Matthew Prior

"A massive and engrossing wit injection." - idiotica.co.uk

"I wouldn't know satire if it bit me on the arse. But I did like the Naomi Campbell joke." - Matt Kelly (The Mirror)

"Has had an understandably high profile among people who know about these things." - Guy Clapperton (Guardian Online)

"Satirical sideswipes at the burning issues of the day." - Radio 5 Live

"Puerile and worthless... Truly fabulous... Do read the whole thing." - Stephen Pollard

The Friday Thing 2001-2008 - All Rights Reserved