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Home > People

Reputation, reputation

24 July 2005

Roman Polanski is one of film’s more, as some smirking sources would euphemistically put it, ‘colourful characters’. He was married to Charles Manson’s famous victim Sharon Tate. He is famous for directing Rosemary’s Baby (giving a cameo to fine upstanding Satanist Anton LaVey), thereby making thousands of women wonder if their partners had been craftily shagging them in their sleep. But he is possibly even more famous for having sex with a 13-year-old girl. Hey, it was the 70s.

Polanski and the girl partook of champagne, Quaaludes and hot-tub hanky-panky at Jack Nicholson’s house. (Jack was elsewhere wondering if his sister was actually his mother.) The director was later arrested and charged with rape of a minor, rape by use of a drug, and four other counts of young-druggy-sex badness. Then he nipped off to Europe before the sentencing hearing, and hasn’t been back to the USA since. These things are not in dispute. What is in dispute, hotly and in a court of law, is that a grieving Polanski did on the night of his wife’s funeral in 1969 touch the thigh of a Scandinavian woman in a restaurant. Such was the terrible allegation of a 2002 article in Vanity Fair. The TFT team are united in condemnation of the smearing of such a morally unimpeachable figure in this disgusting, prurient, thigh-touchy way. We hope that Polanski’s unintentionally hilarious, um, brave effort to clear his name and unmucky his reputation will set an example to other wronged and distressed individuals.

1) Osama bin Laden sues all international television networks for showing him in ‘an unflattering light’ when broadcasting his videos. ‘My beard was airbrushed, and my eyes made to look cold and psychotic,’ he is reported to complain. ‘You will all die like dogs.’

2) Robert Downey Jr sues E!Online for suggesting that he once took some Night Nurse when he was feeling a bit crock.

3) The families of Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold sue USA Today over allegations that the boys used to pick their noses and eat it.

4) Family of Jeffrey Dahmer outraged at same paper’s suggestion that the predatory cannibal used neither a fork nor a napkin.

5) A distraught Paris Hilton tells court: ‘I did not show my ankle.’



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