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Home > World

An Italian writes...

The clown prince of darkness, His Holiness the Pope, has been up to his naughty tricks again.

11 July 2003

Last weekend, the Pope called for greater chastity amongst young people. Enter Father Antonio Rungia. Taking a well-earned break from his alleged harem of underage boys, promotion-eyed Rungia pushed his thumb into the doddering old nerd's papal hole and pulled out a guide. The so-called 'User's Guide to Chastity'.

What follows is a fairly literal translation of the so-called Ten Commandments of Aestival Chastity, without very little or no bigoted church-hating embellishment. As is clear from the offset, all of it is directed primarily at women. Women like Mary Magdalene, and other cleavage-wielding whores. For as the Catholic Church is only too well aware, it may take two to tango, but only one to tempt a man to hell.

    1) Do not dress in such a way as to draw attention to your body.

    2) Do not go to morally questionable places (excepting churches).

    3) Do not accept any kind of invitation, particularly from strangers (excepting priests) or to strange places (excepting the Kingdom of Heaven).

    4) Accept lifts from no-one that you do not know personally (no exceptions, no public transport).

    5) Do not flaunt your body, especially if you have a good one. (If you're a shapeless, plain woman, do as you wish. You will not be noticed.)

    6) Don't let people with erotic intentions play with your mind. They will fuck you up royally.

    7) Don't get involved in any kind of group sex or cultist behaviour (excepting of course, the weekly sleepover round at Rungia’s gaff).

    8) Do not follow those who think free sex is a good thing - especially in summer.

    9) Read books which promote respect for human beings - especially women.

    10) Rejoice in values such as love, fidelity, and purity of the body and of the soul. Amen.

Thankfully, the young are much like the rest of Italy, and indeed the world - except a few old dears whose genitals ceased to function decades ago - and nobody really gives a flying fuck what the Pope - or any of his child-abusing minions - say or think. And why? Because God is dead! Ha ha!

More chastity:


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