2001-2008
Home
Main
- About TFT
Friday Thing Archive
- Politics
- Media
- Culture and Society
- War On Terror
- People
- Places
- World
- Popped Clogs
- Music
- Books
- Film
- Etc
Help And Info
- Contact Details
- Advertising
- Jobs
- Privacy Policy
- XML Feed

Home > World

The TFT Guide To: Doing your bit for tsunami relief

It's easy to feel powerless in the face of enormous natural disasters, especially if all you've done is sit in front of the telly wishing some more interesting news would come on - you know, something with a proper narrative, intrigue and a bad guy, like a good serial killer. But when you finally do get off your fat arse and drop 20p in a charity tin, how can you be sure you're helping as much as you can?

15 January 2005

1) Make sure you only give to reputable charities. If the man from Christian Aid smells of Special Brew, is carrying a collecting tin with the words 'Canser Relief' crudely crossed out, and says 'Come on mate, you can give a bit more than that!', they may not be an accredited fund-raiser.

2) Collect a bin bag full of bottle tops and tin foil. This won't help tsunami victims, but it will give you a pleasant nostalgia trip back to childhood Blue Peter campaigns. (To heighten the effect, whenever you see someone behave clumsily, stick your tongue under your lower lip, wave your hands about and shout 'JOEY!')

3) If you're a doctor or engineer, travel out to disaster-struck areas and volunteer your professional expertise. If you work in PR, travel out to disaster-struck areas with your lap-top and send out thousands of press releases that are thinly-veiled adverts, eg. 'Breville pledges 200 sandwich toasters', 'Big-hearted Tesco staff donate unwanted Christmas presents', and 'Mr Posh Paws is alive! Whiskas UK sponsors miracle cat'.

4) Organise a charity activity geared to bolstering your own pathetic ego, eg. a workplace fun run that just happens toinvolve getting your picture in the local paper, standing next to Natasha Kaplinsky.

5) It's vital to ensure that charity funds get to the right people. Aid this process by sitting in the pub opining that all the money 'will just go to dictators', and that's why you've just spent 15 on Stella but refuse to put 50p in the collecting tin.



Comment on this article: letters@thefridaything.co.uk

Subscribe to The Friday Thing for free


 ABOUT THE FRIDAY THING
Bad words ahead The Friday Thing is a weekly email comment sheet. Casting a cynical eye over the week's events, it is rarely fair and never balanced.

A selection of articles from each week's issue appear online, but to enjoy the full Thing, delivered by email every Friday - as well as access to almost five years of back issues - you'll need to subscribe. It's absolutely free.

READERS WRITE
"Razor-sharp comment and gossip." - The Sunday Times

"Hilariously cynical..To describe it as 'irreverent' is to do the newsletter an injustice." - The Observer

"Sharp, intelligent, opinionated, uncompromising and very, very funny. Just like 'Private Eye' used to be." - Alec McKelland

"Wicked" - Channel 4

"Ace" - Time Out

"'We rise once again in advocacy of The Friday Thing. We realize that some of you may be unwilling to spend [your money] on plain-text comment, but you're only depriving yourself." - The Minor Fall, The Major Lift

"Subscribing to this at the beginning of the year was undoubtedly one of the better decisions I've made. Superlative, and utterly marvellous. I look forward to Fridays now, because I can't wait for the next issue. Fucking fucking brilliant." - Meish.org

"Featuring writers from The Observer, Smack The Pony and The 11 O'Clock Show... will continue to attract new subscribers sight unseen" - NeedToKnow

"The Friday Thing is so good it's stopping me from doing a bunk of a Friday afternoon." - Annie Blinkhorn (The Erotic Review)

"So now" - The Evening Standard

"Damn it, you rule. May you never, ever back down." - Paul Mayze

"Ace" - PopJustice

"Snarky" - Online Journalism Review

"Can you please stop making me laugh out loud... I'm supposed to be working, you know!" - Tamsin Tyrwhitt

"Your coverage of stuff as it spills is right on the money." - Mike Woods

"Popbitch with A-Levels." - Tim Footman

"In an inbox full of trite work-related nonsense, TFT shines from under its subject heading like the sun out of Angus Deayton's arse." - Nikki Hunt

"A first rate email. It's become an integral part of my week, and my life would be empty and meaningless without it (well, *more* empty and meaningless anyway)." - Mark Pugh

"Genius, absolute bit of class. And you can quote me on that." - Lee Neville

"If you're hipper than hell, this is what you read." - MarketingSherpa

"The most entertaining email I've had all week. Great tone." - Matthew Prior

"A massive and engrossing wit injection." - idiotica.co.uk

"I wouldn't know satire if it bit me on the arse. But I did like the Naomi Campbell joke." - Matt Kelly (The Mirror)

"Has had an understandably high profile among people who know about these things." - Guy Clapperton (Guardian Online)

"Satirical sideswipes at the burning issues of the day." - Radio 5 Live

"Puerile and worthless... Truly fabulous... Do read the whole thing." - Stephen Pollard

The Friday Thing 2001-2008 - All Rights Reserved